The A to Z of Pop - W is for WTF

The A to Z of Pop

by Jo Michelmore

It was actually a couple of weeks ago that I first knew what the W in the A to Z of Pop would stand for. One part of me just wanted to post clips of Robbie Williams, another part of me wanted to post pics of pop stars that deserve the hashtag that has become popular amongst those of our IMKOS team who attended BIGSOUND - #wankwankwank (and no, I myself do not think Robbie Williams and that hashtag could be one and the same thing, although I understand a lot of people would disagree with me). 

W was inspired when a friend of mine got out of their car one day to meet me and proclaimed upon seeing me; "Pop music. Like, just...WTF?" (yes, they did use the letters, not the words and hence the G-rating of this post). When I enquired as to what they meant exactly, they described their confusion at the songs they had recently heard on the radio and why they were angry and a more than a little confused. Now, dear readers, I shall share their confusion with you and maybe you can shed some light on the matter. Or not. Either way, I'm gonna admit, I kinda agree with my friend and I guess that's why we're friends.

"I'm bringing booty back"

Er, Meghan, where do you think booty went? Booty has actually never gone anywhere, except for maybe a brief year or two in the early 90s when heroin chic became such a thing, but even then, Sir-Mix-A-Lot was going on about Becky's butt well before Nicki started on about anacondas, so how could you possibly be bringing it back? WTF?

"Bring the beat back"

Katy, the beat never went anywhere. Just because you decided to ignore it with what I personally consider is your worst song, the actual beat never disappeared. It's written into your freakin song. The beat never went anywhere. You stopped it. This is a tool sometimes used in music. Stop pretending you didn't know it was going to happen. WTF?

"Will your eyes still smile from your cheeks?"

You know what Sheeran? The cheek is actually the soft part of your face below your eyes. If your eyes were on your cheeks, they'd actually be in the middle of your face, next to your nose and that would just be weird. Or they'd be on your butt and now we're just getting back to old mate Trainor and her claim to bring booty back from somewhere and this is why I dedicated the S in the A to Z of Pop to you. WTF?

The A to Z of Pop - S is for Two Words That Start With 'Sh'

This is getting ridiculous...

The A to Z of Pop

by Jo Michelmore

It has come to my attention in recent times, that I may be one of the only people in the world who feels this way, but, well, sometimes you just gotta admit these things. 


Like the ginger Pharrell, except not as talented, currently experiencing his fifteen minutes of fame. Which is fine. But while everyone else seems to be loving the shit out of him, I have only one thought about him.


Ed Sheeran? He's shit.
 

Example A: 'Sing'
Best(?) lyric: "oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, louder, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh sing"....zzzzzzzzz.
Sheeran: Shit.

Example B: 'Give Me Love'

Best(?) lyric:  "my, my, my, my, oh give me love, my, my, my, my, oh give me love, my, my, my, my, oh give me love, my, my, my, my, give me love"....zzzzzzzzz.
Sheeran: Shit.

Example C: 'Don't'
Best(?) lyric: "ah lahmlahlah, ah lahmlahlah"....zzzzzzzzz.
Sheeran: Shit.


Three is more than enough (pain). Exactly as you say Sheeran; don't. Quiet. Shush. I don't get it. You're shit. 

Top 25 - 25 May, 2014

Bertie Blackman, Andy Bull + Alison Wonderland!

1. The Griswolds - Beware The Dog





2. Iggy Azalea ft. Charli XCX - Fancy





3. Kimbra - 90s Music





4. Boyeur - Cupid





5. Dustin Tebbutt - Bones (NEW)





6. Alison Wonderland - I Want U (NEW)





7. Jack White - Lazaretto





8. Andy Bull - Talk Too Much (NEW)





9. La Roux - Let Me Down Gently





10. Bertie Blackman - Run For Your Life (NEW)





11. Rae Morris ft. Fryars - Cold (NEW)





12. Ruby Boots - Oh Lover





13. Airling - The Runner (NEW)





14. Our Man In Berlin - Flight





15. Ball Park Music - Trippin' The Light Fantastic (NEW)





16. The Trouble With Templeton - Heavy Lifting (NEW)





17. Little Bastard - Be My Kind





18. The Hics - All We'll Know





19. Ed Sheeran - All Of The Stars (Re-Entry)





20. Noosa - Clocktower





21. Lykke Li - Just Like A Dream





22. Lancelot ft. Ngaiire - Ain't Nothin' Going On But The Rent (Re-Entry)





23. Remi - Tyson





24. Torres - New Skin





25. Seinabo Sey - Hard Time

Top 25 - 11 May, 2014

Kimbra, Jack White, Lykke Li + Seinabo Sey!

1. Kimbra - 90s Music (NEW)





2. Our Man In Berlin - Flight





3. Ruby Boots - Oh Lover





4. Iggy Azalea ft. Charli XCX - Fancy





5. Jack White - Lazaretto (NEW)





6. Lykke Li - Just Like A Dream (NEW)





7. Torres - New Skin





8. Montaigne - I'm A Fantastic Wreck





9. Al Parkinson - Like This





10. Little Earthquake - Brightside (NEW)





11. Howling Bells - Slowburn





12. Tired Lion - Are You Listening... Listener?





13. Lancelot ft. Ngaiire - Ain't Nothin' Going on But the Rent





14. Gold Spectacles - What We Might Have Been





15. Japanese Wallpaper ft. Pepa Knight - Waves (NEW)





16. Remi - Tyson





17. Garbage ft. Brody Dalle - Girls Talk (NEW)





18. Ed Sheeran - All Of The Stars (NEW)





19. Northeast Party House - The Haunted





20. Lana Rel Rey - West Coast





21. The Hics - All We'll Know (NEW)





22. Royksopp and Robyn - Do It Again





23. Lily Allen - L8 CMMR (NEW)





24. Seinabo Sey - Hard Time (NEW)





25. Holly Who - Get A Little More

Where Is My Mind? - For Valentine's Day I Want...

Valen-pizza anyone? Yes please.

Less Vom. Please.

by Jo Michelmore

Anyone who reads our little blog on a (semi?) regular basis may have noticed we're not necessarily fans of Valentine's Day on this here blog. Me personally, there's not many days I like less. But I'm not going to go into that or my current relationship status. It's none of your business. Regardless, I've decided since it's Valentine's Day tomorrow and since we've already done so much hating here at It's My Kind Of Scene, maybe I should look at the other side of Valentines.


You know what that is? The non-vom worthy side.


There's a thing I dislike more than Valentine's itself and that's the Valentine's playlist. Power ballad, love songs, top 100 sweet songs, top 20 songs to a make out to...blah blah blah. They're all there. Google it. Well, you can take your Celines and your Whitneys and your Sheerans and your Eltons can take all your Bruno Mars' and you can shove 'em.


Since we left off last week on a song involving hearts, let's start with another one this week...

The strings, the pipes, it starts at the very beginnning and just gets worse and worse. Vom. For Valentine's, I want less of this...

and more of this...

He may not have written it, but Jose G did a really really really good cover of it. And it might not be all love and sweetness, but that one line, the way he sings it; "sharing different heartbeats, in one night" it's so freakin good I put it in my Valentine's list anyway.


I don't think I've mentioned this guy much on this blog, 'cause you know, that old saying, if you've got nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. Vom. For Valentine's, I want less of this...

and more of this...

You read the blog, you know I love Pearl Jam. Valentine's Day means I get to declare this love again, and since I'm writing and you're reading, you deal with it. And Sheeran thinks he can sing a sweet song. Pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffftttttttt.


I don't hate ol Mars, far from it. But obvious lyrics just don't have to be so obvious. "You're amazing just the way you are?" Duh. And vom. For Valentine's I want less of this...

and more of this...

"Home is wherever I'm with you." See Bruno? Sweet, not obvious. You wanna know what to write on your Valentine's card? Read some Edward Sharpe lyrics. You'll find something in there.


I always thought this song was just one giant backward insult. "You still have to squeeze into your jeans?" Are you calling me fat? Vom. For Valentine's, I want less of this...

and more of this...

Shut up 1D. THIS is the cutest song, ever. And lucky for you and me it involves The White Stripes. Which involves Jack White. Oh Jack, oh sigh.


You're beautiful to me suggests you're actually pretty hideous, but I like you, so don't worry. Not a compliment. Don't say that to anyone on V Day. Vom. For Valentine's, I want less of this...

and more of this...

Oh, see, now we're talking about the perfect love song. Incredibly depressing, incredibly uplifting. You do realise that everyone you know someday will die, right? You better tell them you like them, now. If you never read another word of mine, just read these. Valentine's schmalentines. You like someone, you like your family, you like your next door neighbour, you like your friends? Tell 'em all, tell 'em now. They deserve to know. Not just on Valentine's. They've probably all got beautiful faces.


Where will my mind be next week? Something much less Valentines-ey. I promise. But you do have a beautiful face, just so you know.